Friday, 12 December 2014

TEN: Mirror, mirror on the wall.



“Telling yourself you like the way you look is easy. Believing it is an entirely different kettle of whales.” 
 Andrew Biss, The Impressionists from the short story Big Girl

I have a friend who has a mirror by her front door.  Every time she goes out that door, she stops and checks herself in that mirror.  But she doesn’t admire herself.  She stares, frowns, squints, pulls at imaginary bumps of clothing.  I imagine she might sometime stick her tongue out and raspberry the image in that mirror.

I have a problem with mirrors.  The image in the mirror is not a reflection of how I think I look.  I think I still look like I did at 20 years of age!  Then I see this lady in the mirror and I am so disappointed. What happened?  Perhaps mirrors should reflect how we feel at the moment, showing us what we want to see? Or do we already place a great deal of emotional value on that image and our moods do change the way we see ourselves?

Thinking of people as mirrors:  Do I believe a friend who compliments me on a particular aspect one day MORE or LESS than I believe the mirror I looked in before leaving the house?  I know that if I liked the image in the real mirror that day, I am more likely to be pleased by my friend’s observation.  But if I thought the mirror image was ‘less than’ my ideal, I tend to think my friend is just being nice and trying to make me feel better.  Perspective is everything.

There is an old saying that you have to love yourself to be able to love others.  I found this blog as I was researching this saying:  http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/maybe-its-just-me/201004/loving-yourself-how-important-is-it  I think that you have to be comfortable enough with yourself to appreciate the opinions of others.  If you are bogged down in self-loathing, it is very difficult to see anyone else’s light while you are sitting in the dark. 


I'm starting with the man in the mirror
I'm asking him to change his ways
And no message could have been any clearer
If you want to make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself then make a change.

Michael Jackson, “Man in the Mirror”  

1 comment:

  1. I wonder if Micheal wore his sunglasses when he looked in the mirror? :)

    ReplyDelete