SEVEN: Choice Saved My Life

Retrieved from Facebook on November 29, 2014.


Choice keeps me sane.

Long ago, when I was a new mom and working full time and directing plays and dealing with the sudden death of my own mom and being generally unhappy with my life at the time (whew!) a friend was worried about my health.  He said he had read an article about stress and cancer rates in women who felt trapped in their lives.  He was concerned that I was headed down that road.

I took that information to heart.  My mom had just died of cancer.  She had always had bowel issues so when she started seeing blood she just assumed it was a fissure or hemorrhoid.  She was on vacation with my dad at the time and was concerned enough to seek help at the local hospital.  Years later, my dad told me that the doctor expressed concern had advised her to stay for further tests or to follow up with her doctors at home. She said she would follow up at home.  That was in September of 1994.  She did not follow up at home.  She died in June of 1995.

My dad has always felt like it was his fault that he didn't make her go for the tests.  She said she was better and he believed her.  Maybe she did feel better.  Maybe she was scared.  Either way, she made a choice.

My friend's information changed the way I thought about my life.  I stopped feeling trapped and reminded myself that I CHOSE to be a wife and mother and teacher.  That I could chose to be otherwise but, for now, I chose to life with these responsibilities.  Sometimes I reminded myself several times a day!  But, ultimately, I could choose to stay or go.  And I continued to choose to stay.

I am happy to say that I no longer feel trapped.  It's been twenty years since that conversation with my friend.  And I can't thank him enough for giving me that insight.  I am sure he saved my life.

Maybe God is calling you tonight
To tell me something
That might save my life
Sidewalk Prophets, "Save My Life"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8_gJ68kksWE